Episode 219: The Rock'N'Roll Zoo Pat and Co-Host April Richardson spend a day at the "Rock'N'Roll Zoo" by playing songs that have animals in the title. From September 24, 2015
With your hosts:
"Fuck it!" That's how we start this week's podcast. It's a late night record and Kyle is pounding down the Arnold Palmers. April is trying to cut out sugars; meanwhile she's drinking sweet tea. Pat recaps the Canada episode with Ben Weber. "Oh, pick Mike, whatever then," says April. She's obviously jealous of the "Fly Honey" Mike Siegel being picked over her. Ben brought everyone a bottle of maple syrup, which I believe is considered a mating ritual in Canada. This reminds April of when she used to make syrup sandwiches as a redneck kid growing up in the South. As a kid, April was a self-described dump truck: cakes, cookies, candies, they were all going down her gullet. Now that she's in her thirties, April's gotta take that stuff easy. Fewer Milk Duds, more Pilates.
Pat has a fun show idea for April called "April from TV." You recreate a classic TV show and insert April into the episodes. Just put her in a bunch of shows: Night Court, The Ropers, Magnum P.I., AfterMASH, Cop Rock, Baby Bob. In other April Richardson news, she recently went on a rad date. He was a gentleman who paid for some dinner and drinks. April is hush on his identity.
As for Young Master Kyle, he recently ran a 5K in San Francisco. His completion time: a respectable 34:55. His friend, meanwhile, smoked him at a much more respectable 21 minutes. Then they ate some Chinese food to celebrate like proper runners. "5K, that's like 5000 miles," jokes April.
Today's topic is called the Rock and Roll Zoo and it's a sequel to the Gary Lucy-era episode "Simply the Beast." These are songs with animals in the title. April admits her list is a little lacking due to time constraints. And it's hard to think of a wide variety of animals when there is a deadline.
Pat kicks open the doors to the Rock and Roll Zoo with his first pick. Off the album Zenyatta Mondatta, it's The Police with "Canary in a Coalmine".
April's first pick is the band The Stone Roses. She plays "Elephant Stone" from the compilation album The Very Best of The Stone Roses.
Pat wants to do an episode about his next pick, Elton John. Off the album Honky Chateau, it's "Honky Cat".
Pat and April gush over their love of cheesy 80s Elton John. April admits that she has ended karaoke parties by singing "Sad Songs (Say So Much)." Pat teases that this will be the next Pat-April episode. In the meantime, April plays her next pick. It's the horror punk maestros The Misfits with "Where Eagles Dare" from the album Walk Among Us.
And now, the opposite. Pat plays "Honey Bee" by Tom Petty off the album Wildflowers. Talk of Geoff Tate's fandom of Tom Petty leads to April discussing her desire for an Elvis TCB tattoo. She wants to get it in Memphis, maybe even Graceland. Not in the bathroom, though. God knows what evil X-Files voodoo will happen if she gets an Elvis tattoo in the same room where he died.
"No one's flushed it. There's still an upper decker."
- Kyle, on the preservation of Elvis' toilet, with one of the lines of the episode.
April already has a Billy Bragg tattoo, which is interesting because she's friends with him. She showed it to Billy once and he kind of made fun of her for it. But he did it in a playful way, so it's all good. April continues with her next animal song. Off the album Peter Gabriel: Security, it's "Shock the Monkey" by Peter Gabriel. "Young Peter Gabriel can get it!" shouts April.
Pat's next pick is a newer song. He plays "Dog Days Are Over" by Florence + the Machine off the album Lungs.
Up next for April is The B-52's. Off their self-titled debut album, it's the song "Rock Lobster". This isn't a song, this is an event. April asks Pat if he remembers the old days when artists went balls to the wall weird and creative. April wants to dress up like Siouxsie Sioux or Kate Pierson and do stand-up comedy. She just wants to do it. Would it work? As long as her mouth isn't covered like Bane, I think she'd be okay.
After discussing Tig Notaro taking her shirt off, we return to the music. Pat plays the song "Little Bird" by The White Stripes off the album De Stijl.
"Sometimes he looks like a vampire and a Native American woman had a kid, and sometimes he's, like, hot."
- April, on Jack White's flip-flopping handsomeness.
April's next song is by favorites Manic Street Preachers. Off the album Send Away the Tigers, it's the song "Send Away the Tigers".
"I literally thought this was the Jared Leto band," says Pat. Uh oh. Big mistake. "Fuck! Off!" shouts April. How dare Pat compare Manic Street Preachers to 30 Seconds to Mars. What is he, some sort of uncultured hill person? Thankfully Pat gets back in everyone's good graces with his next pick. It's "Elephant Gun" by David Lee Roth off the album Eat 'Em and Smile. And of course, Pat plays the Spanish version as well.
April's got some twee for us all to enjoy. Off the album The Life Pursuit, it's Belle & Sebastian with "Funny Little Frog".
"This is not a hot guy," Pat explains about his next pick. He plays "The Lamb Lies Down on Broadway" by Genesis from the album The Lamb Lies Down on Broadway. This was not handsome solo Peter Gabriel. This was purposefully ugly progressive rock weirdo Peter Gabriel. It's kinda the reason Genesis sought out the more straightforward Phil Collins to be their next singer. At least Phil wasn't wearing sunflower hats and singing about Giant Hogweeds.
April's next pick brings back horrible memories of the Super Mario Bros. movie. It's "Walk the Dinosaur" by Was (Not Was) off the album What Up, Dog?.
"This is a guy who has a sister named Marie... and a bunch of brothers no one gives a shit about."
- Pat, introducing his next pick, with the other line of the episode.
Pat plays "Puppy Love" by Donny Osmond off the album Portrait of Donny.
April's next pick is the band Pulp. She plays "Dogs Are Everywhere" off the compilation album Masters of the Universe.
Pat believes that his next pick is a case of lazy songwriting. Off the boxset Tracks, it's Bruce Springsteen with "Lion's Den".
April follows up one big feline with another. She plays "Life with the Lions" by her good buddy Billy Bragg from the album Worker's Playtime.
Rock Solid gets a bit more rockin' with Pat's next pick. He plays The Foo Fighters with "Monkey Wrench" off the album The Colour and the Shape.
April drops a bomb by playing a song with the word "trout" in the title. Off the album Homebrew, it's "Trout" by Neneh Cherry feat. Michael Stipe.
Okay everyone, strap in. Pat has a really weird The Who song for us. Off of A Quick One, it's "Boris the Spider". Never been a fan of that one.
Oh look, another artist that April personally knows. It's The Beautiful South with "Blackbird on the Wire" from the album Blue Is the Colour. "Didn't they stay at your house or something?" asks Kyle. "No, they did not," corrects April.
Pat's next pick is "Slow Cheetah" by The Red Hot Chili Peppers off the album Stadium Arcadium. Pat asks the young people for their thoughts on the Chili Peps. If Kyle had a mix of songs, he would listen. But he can't listen to a whole album. April isn't a fan, but she doesn't hate them. Thank you, young people, for your input.
April's next song aptly describes one Pat Francis. It's Beck with "Jack-Ass" from the album Odelay.
Does anyone know what this next song means? Pat doesn't and neither do I. But who cares, it's great. Off the album Seven and the Ragged Tiger (which Kyle pronounces as the one syllable "ragged" and not the two syllable "rag-ged" as it's supposed to be said). Surprisingly Duran Duran was not on April's 80s radar. No hate, she just never got them. But she was into Wham! Whatever happened to Andrew Ridgely, they wonder. Currently living off his Wham! money and sharing the wealth with his Bananarama girlfriend.
Hip hop is the next section for the Rock and Roll Zoo. It's "Brass Monkey" by Beastie Boys off the album Paul's Boutique.
If only "Holy Diver" was called "Ride the Tiger", then this song could have been played on the show. But alas, Pat has a different song called "Ride the Tiger". It's by Jefferson Airplane off the album Dragon Fly.
April follows this up with another monkey song. This lady is bananas! HA HA! COMEDY HUMOR! She plays "Robots and Monkeys" by The Ordinary Boys from the album Over the Counter Culture.
Pat has a different version of "Wild Horses" by The Rolling Stones. It is an acoustic version from the album Stripped. April's favorite version of this song is the cover done by The Sundays in the movie Fear, where Mark Wahlberg fingerbangs Reese Witherspoon on the rollercoaster.
We transition to movie talk, including the new movie Daddy's Home with Mark Wahlberg and Will Ferrell. Pat and Kyle don't like comedies that are supposed to be grounded in reality, but have unrealistic stunts. Like when Kevin James got kicked by a horse into a car at 50 miles an hour in Paul Blart 2 and didn't die. Forget stunts, April loses belief when she sees Kevin James be a lawyer in movies. The three agree that they like Kevin and Will and Adam, but it's the movies that suck balls. April was on the Sandler train until Big Daddy. Pat likes Sandler's dramas.
April is still chugging away at stand up. The Funcomfortable Tour with Chris Hardwick is winding down due to The Walking Dead starting up again soon. Pretty soon April will be the one headlining theaters and hosting 8 billion shows at once. All it takes is for Mr. Hardwick to have a happy little accident.
The Rock and Roll Zoo is now closed. All visitors must please leave the park. April takes us out with "Have You Fed the Fish?" by Badly Drawn Boy from the album Have You Fed the Fish?.